Change anything! use skill-power over will-power :
There are hundred of millions of people who are sicker and sadder, than they want to be or need to be because they can not control their own behavior.
What is standing between them : their health and their happiness. Between their dream and their aspiration, is their own behavior. And they dont want it that way, nobody wants it that way. But they have this huge change problem they are part of a huge change problem.
- I know, I should change
- I want to change
- I dont change
Change attempts of 5.000 people, 4400 failure stories and 600 success stories. We did a research study where we had 5,000 people that had change attempts. Of those change attempts, 4,400 of them were failures. That’s alright because you can learn a lot about success by studying failure. 600 of them had taken on a persistent resistant problem of personal change, they had hard metrics to show that they had achieved success, and they’d have sustained it for three or more years. I want to share with you what we’ve learned: at least two major differences.
Clearly the ones who succeeded had agency, the capacity to control their own behavior. And those who didn’t, didn’t. We need to take control of the things that control us so we can control our behavior. “I wish I knew then what I know now?”. I wish I knew then what I know now so I could have helped myself. Because I didn’t have the skills to turn a bad day into a good data.
If we can control our own behaviors, we can get a lot better: if we escape the willpower trap, if we marshall enough influence to make overwhelming problems less overwhelming. If we do that, we can increase our agency. We can come to know that if we work at it, we can change anything.