And so… Well you asked me if doing prison was the hard part, and I spent over 12 years in prison In eighteen years I did twelve total.
And it wasn’t, the hard part wasn’t going to prison it was getting out, and trying to be part of society again. Umm… there was one time I was a contractor, I had four employees 3 bedroom house, blah blah blah blah blah and I…
I had to lose it all to realize it was just stuff, but still… Then, when you’re done with your time and I discharged my sentence in February 11, 2011.
I got my parole papers signed off. I became a citizen again. I can actually vote! I can actually go in and vote for the president.
But, I can’t get a job here or here or here. I can’t have any apartments because they won’t accept felons. And uh, I even went through an agency that took felons, and they’ll give a pedophile an apartment before they will me because I had a drug charge.
I wasn’t even dealing drugs, I had possession. But anybody who has possession of drugs they’re worried about them selling drugs in their apartments, so they won’t give ’em one.
But this place would give a pedophile, somebody who raped a little baby or somethin’ And give them an apartment, but they wouldn’t let me have one ‘cuz of my felony. ‘Cuz I had a drug… felony… And I guess the hard part was becoming part of society again, it’s like they didn’t want me… Umm… They didn’t want me to be part of their society anymore… So I just decided, “fuck it,” I’m gonna sleep in a tent. I’m gonna do what I love for a livin’, which is playin’ music, and if I just make a little bit of money, I’d rather do what I love with a passion and make a little money… …than… …go back to contracting and try to make a lot of money and be part of a society that doesn’t even want me no more… Fuck ’em, y’know? Fuck society.
That’s the way I feel. I feel that, why did… I meet a lot of good people.. but, I believe there’s a lot of good people out there but for the most part.. most people all they care about is themselves..
You could be standing there on the corner bleeding and people just drive by ya. They wouldn’t want no part of, wouldn’t want no part of the drama..
There would be 1 in 10 that might stop and help. y’know I walked up to a woman once to ask her what time it was, I was pushing the cart, me and my wife were pushing our cart, we had all our stuff in a grocery cart I was pushing and I needed to know what time it was, so I went up to ask this woman what time it was, she’s like “Oh get away from me, I don’t have any money, leave me alone!”
I’m like, “I don’t want your money.” She’s like “Just get away from me, go!” I’m like, and I’m thinking, what could have this woman been through if she’s so terrified of a stranger. What if my wife was pregnant, her water just broke, and I needed help? I mean, who knows.
What if I was having chest pain and I needed her to call 911. She didn’t care, it was just “Get away from me, go, I don’t got no money” She just thought all I wanted was her money.
I just wanted too know what time it was. And it hurt, man.
It’s like, damn. People… It does hurt… you know it’s like, damn, it’s humanity, so many people, what have they been through that makes them so terrified of relationships and people that they just don’t want nothin’ to do with nobody? It’s sad. It’s really sad.
But she said “Well, I wasn’t scared of you when I saw you.”
Well, You’re one in a million, you know? I mean, you’re actually sittin’ down and talking to me, you know? Most people don’t give a damn, but it’s alright, you know, when it comes down to it, I came in this world by myself, and when I die I’m going to be the only one in that coffin.
And, uh, So all I really guess that matters is, me, I guess. I dunno.
I think people matter, but, More I’m starting to see, less and less *cameraman* You matter bro. I feel that way about you too, man, you matter, I mean, you care.
She said : You matter either.
It’s sad to see that most people don’t It’s just sad, because there’s so much beautiful things in life there’s many beautiful things in life. Relationships are beautiful but nobody wants relationships.
Check this out, I’ve got over 240-some friends on Facebook, most of them I knew from high school I mean I knew a lot of people, I got around, alright. Um, 240-some people I know on Facebook Most of them I thought were good friends from high school, but, Christmas day, I Facebooked them all and I’m like, “Hey, it’s Christmas, I haven’t to some of you all in over 20 years, here’s my number, call me.”
“Let’s have a conversation.”.
And I posted that thing over and over Christmas day.
Nobody. And I’m talkin’ people that asked me to be their friend. “Oh, so and so, wants you to be your friend.” Well, I know this person from high school, sure, I’ll be their friend.
But they never called…
She : “What’s that mean?” It means people don’t want relationships no more. They’re so into their internet, and so into their Facebook they got their… This is their idol The internet’s become an idol, man, it’s like, people don’t want relationships.
They want the kind of relationships where they can be who they want to be and be who they are.
You know, instead of being who they are, be who they want to be. and pretend to be. Oh yeah, I’m 6 foot 4, I’ve got dark hair and blue eyes and big shoulders but then I can’t ever meet this person because “I don’t look like that.”.
You know? And most people, On these internet relationships, man, I even, a girl, my high school sweetheart, okay, I hooked up with her on Facebook, contacted her, “Hey let’s meet.”
Well, she gave me her number, she’s like “Well look, just text me”.
I really don’t have time for conversations no more. She would rather text back and forth for two hours, texting, back and forth instead of having a ten minute conversation that could have summed it all up.
People don’t want conversations, they want… They don’t want nothin’ no more, I don’t know what they want. But this world sucks man. and the way that people see it. Really.